(overheard in staff lounge this morning)
i was thinking about this and i realized that i don't even like the pineapple with emerald wreath. i mean, who would?!? no wonder i couldn't get it! luckily, i'd already decided to switch to Marje's Super Amazing Rainbow Jello, made by my cousin every thanksgiving as long as i can remember. she even used the jello to let me know she knew i was queer: for years she'd told me that she'd give me the recipe on my wedding day. the year she said to me, "you know, deepfry, i'll give you that recipe whenever you want it. you don't need to be married to have it," i knew she was in the know.
so, it's appropriate to make the jello for a party that sort of romanticizes the incredibly stifling and oppressive decade that is the 1950s. i put on my peddle pushers, white blouse, sensible pumps, did up my hair in a hanky and pulled out the ingredients for the jello: generic coolwhip and four flavors of jello. my cousin advised against grape, blueberry and banana. i got strawberry, lime, lemon and orange. classics. after mixing each in it's own bowl, i put them i the fridge to set until "it doesn't just dribble off the spoon." Thirty minutes later, i pulled out the jello and mixed each with 6 oz. of coolwhip. i spooned at random from each bown until the mold was full. and well, we'll see how it goes!